If you believe you won’t be able to excel or prosper as a person, ministry, church, or business without a “particular individual or entity”, you have placed more faith in that party than God. Thusly, the person or entity has become your God. Jesus said, “apart from ME (not your pastor, spouse, child, boss, church, etc.)  you can do nothing”  (John 15:5).

Be blessed,

Roline

DON’T BELIEVE THE LIE - Arguing

Most of us were told "when you get married, you ARE going to argue.” The first year of my marriage, I endeavored to be the undefeated argument champion in my home. I didn’t seek to resolve conflict, I desired to WIN! After all, isn’t MY WAY THE WAY TO DO IT? So I thought!

A marriage is to glorify God. Marriage is to be a reflection of the relationship of Christ and the universal church. Keeping these two points in mind do you think you are glorifying God when you argue with your spouse? Do you think Christ argues with his people? Nowhere in the Bible do we see Jesus getting into an arguing match, so if Christ is our example of how to conduct ourselves, who are we patterning ourselves after when we argue in our marriage?

When a person tells you that you will argue in married, DON'T BELIEVE THAT LIE! It is a lie of the enemy. We must be careful of what we allow people to deposit in our spirit. If you believe you are going to argue you will argue, for the Bible says as a man think in his heart so is he.

The Bible does not tell us that couples are to argue. Conversely, it commands us to give respect to one another, to love one another, to be patient with one another , and to encourage one another. So why are we Christians buying into the lie?

As a couple, you both must agree to never argue again. God can give you that peace. I have been married to my husband for 19 years, with the last 18 being argument free!

The Bible says "Be angry and sin not" (Eph. 4:26). We have to learn to control our anger and not allow our anger to control us. Getting into yelling matches is losing control.

Yes, we will disagree as a couple on issues, however, a disagreement does not give cause to an argument.

The Cry of a Nagged-out Husband: MAKE IT STOP!

from Pastor T's wife.....Roline Thomas

Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife. (Proverbs 25:24 NIV)

It has been dreadfully hot in Little Rock. Temperatures have soared above 100 degrees with heat indexes over 110 degrees. A moment outdoors can be intolerable. Today, I really laughed out loud as I visualized a man sitting on top of his roof on a scorching hot day in an effort of getting away from his contentious wife. Proverbs 25:24 clearly warns a wife that a husband may take desperate measures to find peace. He’ll ask to work longer hours, stay out late at bars, increase recreational activities, or find himself in the arms of an encouraging woman just to avoid facing his nagging wife.

Wife, make sure your home is a place where your husband will find peace, encouragement, comfort, and solace. Your job is to build up your husband. There is a difference between CONSTRUCTIVE criticism and DESTRUCTIVE criticism. Even constructive criticism should be administered in moderation. Nagging will only cause a man to shut down, thusly, closing your line of communication with him. Instead of always highlighting his wrongdoings, make sure you daily celebrate your husband for the GOOD in him. Regularly compliment him. Praise his successes. Be his number one cheerleader. If speaking positively to your husband becomes routine, he will be more open and receptive to criticism. Besides, YOU CHOSE TO MARRY HIM!

Choose to speak words of life to your husband. Give him reason to be excited about coming home to you rather than preferring to sit on top your roof sweltering in the blistering rays of the sun. That’s a man desperate to Get away from his wife!  If you don’t give him peace, there’s an Angela, Betsy, and Carmenseeka willing to do your job.----This won’t be happening at my address, NOT ON MY WATCH!

Quote of the Day

If you have LIMITED VISION , God can only use you in a LIMITED WAY.

Quote of the Day

To combat gossip remember this - Carnal questions deserve spiritual answers - that'll shut them up! ` Earnest and Roline

Earnest and Roline Ministries: Quote of the Day

Quote of the Day: "Haters are INTIMIDATED by your ANOINTING. If you have NO HATERS, you have NO ANOITNING. Don't hate your haters---they keep you in close contact with the Lord! ~Roline Thomas

5 Questions Friday

Randomness

1. If you had to choose, how would you prefer to choose to spend money...on landscaping or a pool? Landscaping! I love beautiful curb appeal. I love working in my yard, Besides, pools are too much trouble to maintain.
 

2. Death penalty, yay or nay? I'm leaving this one alone. I don't like getting into debates, so I'm out.

3. What's the worst thing your kid has gotten into when you turned your back/blogged/showered/blinked? My kids were pretty good. I don't remember such incidences.

4. How often do you REALLY go to the dentist? I plead the 5th. My kids go regularly. I have not taken care of myself in this area, however, as soon I as recover from my recent surgery, I'll be going in.

5. What is your favorite animal (doesn't have to be a pet-type animal)? I really don't care for animals. Phobia?---maybe. They are God's beautiful creations from a distance. I wouldn't willfully touch one with a 10 foot pole.

Unrealistic Expectations

By Roline Thomas                                           

6/2/2011

In the church there are those who believe the pastor’s wife should have much Bible knowledge, pray a certain way, look a certain way, talk a certain way,  and/or dress a certain way. As a pastor's wife it seems like everyone has a plan for my role in the church. You should sing, you should play the piano, you should work with the kids, you should wear a hat! When did God leave the Throne and give these people the authority to tell me what to do?! Expectations of church members are often too high for ministers, preacher’s wives, evangelist, etc. Actually they are usually UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS.

For a few years I stopped attending the midweek Bible Study. My children's homework and "at home time" was more important. Since dad is required to be at church, I stayed behind with the kids. I KNOW my kids benefited greatly from my move. However, I had to listen to the "sly remarks" from several members about my absence. UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS.

I am a hat wearing DIVA, and wear one nearly every Sunday. This older sister came to me and told me a Pastor's wife is suppose to set the "dress tone" for the church and she should wear hats. This same lady doesn't wear hats. I wonder where was this "hat law" that she was reciting to me. And why should a Pastor's wife set the tone for attire?---people should be themselves, not someone else. UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS. 

We are to please God and God alone. Since he doesn’t place unrealistic expectations on you, why try to meet another’s? Ministers, and wives who fall into the trap of allowing others to determine your ministry-that is what you are to do in the church-do not know their God given purpose. You must not allow outside people to influence you. No one has the authority to tell you your purpose. You must seek God for direction in ministry, otherwise you will find yourself trying to meet UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS.

Creating Balance Between Home and Ministry

Originally posted 9/2006

A women's primary role is to her home. The home is a great task alone. However, many women today are called to the ministry. Whether it is teaching, preaching, ministering music, etc., many women are called to areas within the ministry that requires much preparation.
There is an old saying, "There aren't enough hours in a day!" God knew what he was doing when he gave man 24 hours per day and created our bodies to rest at least 8 hours of that day. That means we have 16 hours of wake hours. If you daily feel overwhelmed, not rested, and stressed by all the assignments you have taken on, then perhaps you are doing more than

what God has intended for you to do.

Here are some keys to getting balance:

1. Don’t over commit yourself. When asked to do something in the church there is an option opposite to yes-----NO. The person asking for your time is most likely not aware of your previous commitments. It is your responsibility not to take on more than you can handle. The truth of the matter, you will not be able to adequately give attention to an assignment of you are overloaded. Consider scaling back on some of your commitments. How is this done? Ask yourself these questions

a. Is it worth my time?
b. What will be the impact on my family?
c. Is it a part of my purpose?

2. Prioritize your activities. Disorganization in our scheduling of activities will allow non-essential things to crowd into our date book before the really important things. (So you have a date book that you regularly upkeep? ) Decide what is most important to you. I usually place quiet time with God, my husband, and my family above church work. As ministry workers we must be careful of spending too much of our time ministering to the needs of others while never ministering within our own homes. The family comes first.

3. Keep a monthly calendar. Know what other family members are doing. Have a weekly schedule of activities. Have weekly planning meetings with your spouse to determine who will be where and what activities the family will do together. This is a must for my husband and me. We are an extremely busy family, therefore everything must come together on a calendar.
When we did not sit together and plan out our calendar, he would forget to tell me about meetings our even upcoming out of town trips. I thought he was being insensitive, but he really just forgot. Now that we meet each week, I am not surprised when he misses dinner because of a meeting, or he knows when he needs to be home with the kids because I have an engagement.

FIVE QUESTIONS FRIDAY

Can't beleive I'm doing this today. I had surgery this morning and keep zoning in and out, but yet here I am. LOL! I truly am an internet junkie. 

1. Do you apologize to your kids?

If necessary I would. Once my oldest and I didn’t see eye to eye on a matter, and she pointed out my rude behavior. Although she was wrong in what she had done, my reaction was inappropriate. I apologized and hugged her and began praying for peace and forgiveness.

2. What color are your nails right now?

Natural – no color. I had surgery today, and polish was not allowed.

3. When you were growing up, how difficult was it for you to stay home from school sick? (As in, did you have to vomit or just say "I don't feel good".)

What is this thing called “stay home from school sick?” LOL!

4. When is the last time you bought a new comforter for your bed?

May 2009 when I purchased my current home. I began looking for a new comforter earlier this year, but gave up. I want the same color scheme, so I was unsuccessful finding the  right colors. I’ll try looking again in a few months/

5. Favorite website(s)?

Earnestandroline.com of course. LOL! Really, I like Facebook, LearnGospelMusic.com, And anything pertaining to Christian Education.

Five Questions Friday

1. Do you and your spouse go to bed at the same time?

Most of the time we do. We pray together each night. Occasionally, may stay up studying or watching TV.

2. A question for the ladies...What kind of facial hair do you like on your man?

A beard! I love Big Daddy’s beard. Love rubbing my fingers through it. too.

3. What's the worst vacation you've ever taken?

I’ve never experienced a bad vacation.

4. What's the first-ever blog you followed?

Mine. LOL! Actually I really don’t remember.

5. Do you enjoy amusement parks?

Not anymore. My health won’t allow for the walk and standing in lines.

Five Question Friday

1. Tube socks, calf socks, crew, ankle, none? NONE!!!! I'm areal Diva. I don't wear socks! Now if I HAD to, I'd go with an ankle sock.

2. Was your childs (children's) name a mutual decision or was it a debate? Except for the last child, it was a mutual decision. We compromise on the last child--- Me choice for the first name, his choice for the middle name. After all that we refer to her by her middle name. LOL!

3. What is your favorite type of weather? Mid 70's, overcast sky.

4. If left to your own devices, what time would you wake up every day? 10 am

5. Have you bought your cemetery plots yet? no

Five Questions Friday

From another blog, I found this idea of answering 5 random questions on Friday. Let's see how long I can keep this up. Here goes:

1. Have you ever had roommates? Indeed I have. In college, I had a roommate who was not a very "clean" young lady. She was pretty "friendly" with the boys. She ran track and would be out all night. Rarely did I see her take a shower.

2. How many names do you/your children have? (i.e. Prince Charming William Phillip Arthur Louis John Jacob Jingleheimer-Schmidt) Each has a first-middle-last name. I'm pretty conservative, therefore, my kids have names that are easily pronounce, easily spelled, and mean something. They have names that can carry them into adulthood.

3. Did you watch the Royal Wedding? Said I wouldn't but I got sucked into the rebroadcast. The wedding was fabulous. (Okay I said it!)

4. What is the messiest room in your house? Right now, hmmmmm....as always, my youngest room.

5. What is your ideal mothers day? Time alone, in a hotel room, or in my own home with the family away. Quiet time!

Welcome!

Why another blog? Why not! Without conceit, boastfulness, or arrogance, I declare, I have a lot to say. For a not quite 50 year old woman, who is married to a Pastor, I have been subjected to many life’s difficulties within and out of the ministry. I purpose to enlighten and empower others through musings,  meditations, thoughts and such from me to you.

Also, visit my site, earnestandroline.com , and  my other blogs: